I remember clearly asking God for things when I was 7 and under. I wanted specific things, trips to Disneyland, Barbie dolls, etc. I would close my eyes and ask "please please I want this" afterwards I would promise to do something in return but only IF I got what I had asked for. At this point in my life my family had never mentioned to me their future indoctrination that money only comes from hard work. I had zero idea about the system or how things realistically function. I had only pure beliefs, unpolluted by "reason". Just an innocent soul believing gifts would come from the skies only because I wanted them. I have never been shy to ask. I want something and I ask for it, it wasn't any differently in my childhood. I would ask my parents for the things I wanted without remorse, because I didn't think I had to deserve them, wanting was enough, right? No Disney trips for me until age 22 when my boyfriend paid for the trip. No Barbie dolls after the age of 7 either, even when they were on my Santa's list. So, I wonder, if my pure mind, before being implanted meritocratic or hard-working ideas could not manifest the things that wished for, how am I, at age 32 believe in such fantasy? People who claim to manifest money into their lives, claiming to have reached the "right vibration" are the same people who make money selling their secret. It's a scam. I have followed a life of truly believing that I deserved what I dreamed of. I'm in ruin, living in poverty, at my Nana's house, no job, no studies, no opportunities that align to my desires. Wanting and believing that things happen because you dream of them is simply toxic. I have never met anyone in my life that hadn't to work themselves to unhappiness to get the lifestyle they wanted. Or inherited it. Now, since age 15 I have wanted to study in the UK. To this day, No matter how many hours per day worked (and 16h is not too crazy to mention) I have never had the resources to enroll in university. I simply do not have the support or resources to getting something as basic as an education, I never had the grades to get a scholarship either and now I don't even have the age to get a sponsor. My point is, I never stopped believing that I would move to England and study at the university I dreamt of. I have worked hard for the sole purpose of getting an education in the only place I want to have it. Where are my wishes coming true? If I manifested a cup of tea I'd probably get it because I still have $1400 on my bank account. And that's the life that manifestation has brought me to. I first met with the Law of attraction at age 16, reading Rhonda Byrne's The Secret. I strates getting lottery tickets and dreaming of living in London and that would give me the impulse to wake up every day and go to school, thinking that it was happening. People who "manifest" good things into their lives are just too proud to admit they had privileges. And the magic stories have been detrimental for the ones who actually believed they would get just by asking. I didn't create this reality I'm living in, I do not resonate with the life I have, this is not my life. I just want to study in England, and not starve myself for it. Is it too much to ask for? We'll I've been asking for it for 17 years now.