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Hey, I got into a little trouble with law of attraction. Long story short, I learned by experimenting, not by reading any books, so I kind of went off the hook, because when it started to work, I couldn't help myself than to think I'm some kind of an angel. 3 weeks into my new life and I had no doubts, I had it tested all kinds of ways. I manifested everything, random animals, money, sex. Everything! So naturally I wanted to share it with my mother, who always have had negativity in her life, she was always whining about things and this was the first time when I knew I can help her. So I shared it to her in a evelated emotional state, like, I was so enthusiastic that it probably scared her and long story short, I ended up in the mental hospital against my will. Since than I have struggled to get back on the track. First reason being for few years I doubted myself at everything, because I thought what if these people are right and I'm delusional. But than time to time, small things happened again and I just knew that I didn't dream it. Now I'm at the point in my life where I have been frustrated for so long and I have been pushing this confidence and belief in the manifestation somewhere deep down just for other people to not see it, because I think I'm a little afraid or very afraid of someone doing something similar what my mother did. I don't know anyone who would think and who would believe in this miracle as strong as I do, but I'm keeping myself silent, I'm acting like all the "normal" people and I'm getting nowhere, I'm just hurting myself day after day. I tried reading few books about the topic, but there is nothing new, all of that I experienced and went trough and I know it works, I don't need someone to tell me it works, because I know it so well. And still, I'm trying to do everything, like "normal" people. Am I traumatized badly? Am I done? What is this force working against me? |
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Hi there! First of all, I'm sorry you had to go through hospitalisation against your will, I've been there too and I know it's dehumanising, to say the least. What with the random animals and feelings of being an angel? that is the part that sounds a bit off the track and probably a red flag for manic behaviour/hallucinations. Was there empirical proof of what you manifested to show your mum the ''facts''? There's no chance the universe is against you, you're too precious. What I suggest could have happened is that you now live in fear because you paid a big price for spreading your truth to the wrong person so yes, you have trauma. Luckily trauma can be healed too! And it's normally a tough and extensive process but completely achievable. Once you regain your self-confidence you will be in a better shape to manifest the good things you deserve. Acting normal will definitely exhaust your soul and hurt you. You have to be who you feel you are, and if you feel threatened by the people around you, move away to a place where you fit in better. Nobody should live hiding their real self. After one year of hard work on self-esteem, I only came to fully, wholeheartedly understand and FEEL the importance of embracing who you are LAST SUNDAY!! Everything happens at the perfect time, don't lose hope and work on strengthening your self-love! If I were you I would try to recall the emotions you experienced through your golden weeks of manifestation. I'm now learning that manifestation is way more effective when the right emotion accompanies the thought. Maybe you don't need convincing but would benefit from learning manifesting strategies and techniques from more experienced people. I know the marketing around the law of attraction is overwhelming but I think you've come to the right place. Wish you the best. Thank you for the your message. Yeah, you're right, I was off the track a little bit, still don't get why should someone treat something like it hospitalizing. But the levels of intelligence, knowledge are different I guess and people can act in a destructive manner, even those who we call parents, which is a really good lesson.
(20 Jul, 07:49)
og
About the random animals, they were the ones who strengthened my faith. I started manifesting birds flying up, doing some tricks and stuff, but the best was a deer right next to the big road, a little bit in the forest, which is like common thing kind of, but it was like right next to a city and the moment was exactly as I imagined, right. So these moments were those who told me, that bro, it's really happening. Only then I tried to manifest some cash, which I did, 5 bucks, but still.
(20 Jul, 07:52)
og
And after that it just took over me. You know, the feeling. I had 0 doubts, 0 stress and complete silence in my mind, just a feeling which I was following. I was a bit intolerant about people around me, cause it was so tough to see for the first time in my life so many lost minds, who were contributing nothing to this divine unknown where we are living in. So there was some moments, where I was kind of rude towards few people. Also another good lesson, like compassion and patience.
(20 Jul, 07:55)
og
Basically I fucked it up pretty hard for myself :D Thank you again for kind and strong words, surrounding myself with people who knows about this and believes in this divine unknown world where anything can happen and maybe it will work and I will get back on track by being here with you. And manifested can be anything, like, you can move mountains if you really have to. It sounds like fantasy, but, it's not. Being careful what you wish for is a really good advice.
(20 Jul, 08:00)
og
And regarding the empiric evidence, I could have brought up few things, but I was just so overwhelmed, so high in emotions, that I guess I just took it for granted, that my mother would kind of understand me without evidence you know. I was like, tell me what you want, I will get it right away. I could have approached the whole situation with more cold in my blood, but at that moment it just all went in a pretty much uncontrollable manner.
(20 Jul, 08:02)
og
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please, can you explain how you "learned by experimenting, and not by reading any books"? Because, i have read manny books but, i don't know, i feel i am doing something incorrectly. Gladly! I got a job in sales and in sales they use this strategy where you speak with a potential customer and even if I'm bored or whatnot, I have to act as if I'm excited and always look for positive arguments if a customer says something like "It is very expensive", than I would say something kind of stupid with excitement "Yes, this is how you know it's good" or something like "Exactly! Best piece of equipment in the shop" or something like "Your friends are going to be jealous!"
(17 Sep, 16:54)
og
It all kind of makes sense right and usually everyone knows how annoying the sales people are with this approach. So after working a while I got bored, because sales job is just same thing all over again. Like making 50 phone calls a day and repeating the script, just reading from a page. I got so bored that it was impossible to keep up the excitement. While I was a newcomer and all the new experience naturally gave me the excitement, it was easy and interesting.
(17 Sep, 16:56)
og
But then excitement went away. I knew the script from top of my head and it just wasn't interesting anymore and my results dropped. So the teamleader started to talk with me, we listened to few phone calls, good ones and bad ones and he pointed out that in a good phone calls I was like easy going, full with excitement, found a strong positive arguments to different "I got no money", "Your product is stupid" or whatever the customers said. But in a bad calls I could hear it myself. I was bored.
(17 Sep, 16:58)
og
The tone was monotone. No excitement whatsoever. I didn't think a lot of it at the moment. I just kind of tried to fake the excitement. And results got back a little. But it was like up and downs. And than the strangest thing happened. I was seated right next to this really beautiful colleague of my and for a week straight I was landing 10 deals every day. I was not even focusing on customers. I just called a customer and looked on my colleague with a smile and was closing deals.
(17 Sep, 17:01)
og
And than I started to think. I sat at home and I was like, is there really something to it. Is it really so simple. If I call them being excited I have a chance to land myself a really high salary, cause 10 deals a day was a big deal. And that was my little seed of belief. So I started to fake the excitement and the results got better. And than I took further. Oh and one more thing that teamleader usually was saying was, call like you have already closed the deal.
(17 Sep, 17:04)
og
So that what I did. Before the call I just imagined myself closing a deal, got that energy rising, got that excitement and than hit the call button. But than I took it further. When my results got better I thought, what if this works not only at my job. So even outside of the workplace I started to act like I'm selling something. If my girlfriend said something like "Oh, I broke my nail" I would say something like "You can't make such a style on purpose!" you know?
(17 Sep, 17:11)
og
If my friends said something like "My car broke again" I again would say something kind of silly like "Those chicken legs will have some workout yeeeaah". If my colleague at the break said to me "Deam, I have a bad result today" I instantly replied with something like "I have a great result" or smething like "That is a brave choice, you're the man!" you know. And it went on for few weeks, maybe 2 or so. All my friends, all my colleagues said just one thing.
(17 Sep, 17:15)
og
"What is wrong with you?" and "You are just kind of unnatural" or something like "Come on man, stop acting" you know. Cause at work we were just like that while on the phone with customers. I just took it further. So they all were like WTF has happened to me. And all this time, while I was doing this for 2 weeks, I noticed few things that sparked my interest like, strange coincidences. Simply put, I noticed that things I said, like they were around. You know.
(17 Sep, 17:17)
og
Like if we talked about some particular car with a friend, I would see it right after or on the next day and it wasn't just a casual car, it was like a mercedes maybach, simply put, things started to show up from all my "silly" responses. And that was when I put 1+1 together and I that was like another moment of "Can this really be true?" And than I started to do the exact same thing what our temaleader said, call like you already closed a deal.
(17 Sep, 17:19)
og
I just did outside the work. I imagined all kinds of strange things. It wasn't for me important at that time to imagine something that I would benefit from materially, but emotionally. Like I imagined events, natural events. I imagined animals. I imagined how I have the best sex with my girlfriend before we went to bed and it was. First and only time so far when I saw a girl crying after sex. It was unusual, but whatever.
(17 Sep, 17:22)
og
Few days later it all came together. This all fake excitement and acting stopped being fake. I actually became the person. Suddenly colleagues in the morning were like "Hey man, you look better!". But the only thing that changed was that I wasn't acting or faking anymore. It was my true nature. I didn't know what it is, but I knew it works. So yeah, I kinda thought for few days that I'm a God's sent angel or some kind of ressurected Jesus or whatnot.
(17 Sep, 17:24)
og
And that was it. Few weeks of fake excitement. Few weeks of all friends, colleagues looking at me with a strange look. Few weeks of just pushing this idea trough everything. And suddenly it all started to be easy. Too bad it didn't last, because I told my mother about this thing, I thought it would help her with her life and ended up being in a mental hospital. But I'm grateful for experience. It traumatized me a bit. But it just can't be erased you know.
(17 Sep, 17:27)
og
Since my post I have made some progress and worked with myself. Journaling a lot. Trying to let go of sadness and helplessness towards my mother and other people who just refuse to believe in it, who refuse to try and who even look at me as if I'm some kind of a crazy person. But now when I have finally read different books and looked up this topic on internet, I was SURPRISED that there are actually so many people who knows about this thing. I was like NO WAY, I thought I'm the only one.
(17 Sep, 17:29)
og
I thought I'm the first one who has discovered something like this you know. So now I'm free from some dogmas, that I'm some kind of an angel and so on. And looking on my past I should say something like "That's a fun ride I chose!" or something more silly like some sales agent "This is how I know the strong character gets built!" Get it? Like whatever happens, whatever the argument, whatever the universe, the life, other people throw at you, you always go with excitement.
(17 Sep, 17:32)
og
If a car goes by and a dog shit flies into your face, your natural reaction must be "Uuuuu that is a stinky face mask. Must be high quality!" Hope this helps! Don't hesitate to ask more questions. It is my pleasure to help, if it helps.
(17 Sep, 17:33)
og
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