Since I've begun my "inward quest" last year my life has changed dramatically.

New living situation, new expansive hobby, new exciting friends, and a potential for eternal expansion (i can see and feel it)

However it seems I'm coming to the point where I need to release certain people and other things to pursue my new expansive life.

Is this feeling normal? It's not easy to feel yourself growing, experiencing joy in ways I never have while feeling the need to let go of old friends and in this particular case old girlfriend.

The thing is I know what I want out of life; well it's becoming clearer and clearer on a daily basis. But it feels like I’m hurting other people because my number 1 focus is to stay in my vortex and feel good. The girl I was seeing referred to it as me being selfish and I agreed however I’m starting to feel like I may be going about things wrong because I don't want my decisions to hurt other people.

I do understand that when I'm feeling bad that I'm focused in a way that my inner being is not focused but I don't know how to feel good about letting my old life go and pursuing my new life(that I’m very much in love with), while it appears to affect some around me in a negative way.

I hope my rambles make sense. I'm kind of emotional right now and needed to express myself in a forum where I feel like I can receive that which I’m looking for. Whatever that may be.

asked 17 May '11, 18:51

Chris%202's gravatar image

Chris 2

edited 18 May '11, 03:22

Eddie's gravatar image


I would have said what LeeAnn said, but I just wanted to say also that from reading your posts in the past you and I seem to encounter similar things at similar times on our respective paths, and I thought you would like to know these things are happening to me too these days. I was comforted to see your words anyway. :)

(20 May '11, 21:08) aquamarine
showing 0 of 1 show 1 more comments

Hi Chris, I’m not one for beating about the bush or clothing things in fancy words. I prefer the direct approach as it goes straight to the root. When we look at the root and expose it within ourselves for what it really is, we’re dealing with What Actually Is rather than all of the layers on top of it which may conceal the real issue.

It’s great that you’re beginning to discover for yourself that your own happiness and sense of feeling great – the state of well-being - is primary to your having a truly wonderful life experience. Take it as a confirmation that you are on the right track :)

Lighten up my friend. Just continue being yourself and staying with your good feelings. Release your need for things and people to change and then whatever needs to change will do so of its own accord, without any effort or struggle from you. Let It Be ok for others to be as they are, it’s not really your concern unless you want it to be; but then you’ll take on unnecessary pain and suffering.

People will naturally fade in or fade out of your life as you change, because the things that serve them are either: now present within you or they’re no longer present within you. Go easy with this understanding; relax into the knowing of it and integrate it into your awareness.

Due to my own changes, some friends of 30 years are no longer a part of my life experience. While it saddened me in the beginning, eventually I became ecstatic as I realized how much I’d really changed, how much better I felt and how much happier I’d become.

When you really think about it, you’re far better off not having certain people, with their negative attitudes, thoughts and beliefs in your experience, because they’re not serving you. And as you’ve already discovered, the people who replace them do serve you and help to lift you up even higher :)

Realize that everybody decides for themselves whether or not they’ll be offended or upset by the external circumstances of their life, in this case what you're doing or what you're not doing.

You don’t really know what anyone else is thinking anyway, you only know what they say. The bottom line is it doesn’t matter what anyone else is thinking; it only matters what you are thinking and thus, how you are feeling. That is the path to your own joyous evolution my friend :)

I’ll leave you with a helpful quote which seems appropriate to where you are right now:

“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't
matter and those who matter don't mind.” Dr. Seuss – 1904 – 1991


answered 18 May '11, 03:21

Eddie's gravatar image



@Eddie great quote ! going to use that as a signature for my e-mail

(18 May '11, 06:02) ursixx

Yeah, what a great quote :)

(18 May '11, 07:22) Stingray

My 7 yr old's favourite author is Dr Seuss... What a wise man. Great quote :)

(18 May '11, 13:25) Michaela

Thanks guys, I'm just spreading the love :)

(20 May '11, 00:35) Eddie
showing 2 of 4 show 2 more comments

What does she mean, by saying you are being selfish? Does she really mean that you are not putting HER needs ahead of your own? Or are you really being selfish? Only you know the real answer to that! And certainly is it good to think of the feelings of others when appropriate, and it is good to help others. Even so, we are no good to others unless we are taking care of our own happiness and well being first!


answered 17 May '11, 19:38

LeeAnn%201's gravatar image

LeeAnn 1

I have noticed that most people are more negative than I am. I have always tried to find the positive in every situation. Every now and then, I get sucked down by the negativity of the world before I realize that I can choose happiness. Then I go back to being my happy self. When I am my happy self, I am usually not comfortable around most people because they are negative. I study the new biology and quantum mechanics stuff and discuss things on here. It has been very freeing for me to find this site and read these posts. It is like I have been given permission to be happy. I don't need to feel guilty about being happy. It is important though to help others along the way also. Being happy isn't selfish, not sharing it is. Try complimenting the people in your life that you don't want to lose. Help them to find their way up to where you are. Otherwise, let them go. Move on and be happy.


answered 18 May '11, 02:16

Fairy%20Princess's gravatar image

Fairy Princess

Nicely said FP :)

(18 May '11, 13:26) Michaela

It (your life ), really is all about you. We have to look at life and see the duality there. There is your human side to cultivate and your heavenly side to cultivate. As you change your thoughts (vibrational energy)...your heavenly and humanly sides, are affected. As you continue to work on your thoughts and vibrations, you will naturally repel certain things of different vibration and attract things of similar vibration as yourself. Grieve not my friend; just like when you completed elementary school and transitioned to high school. You lost some friends, gained some new ones...and kept the education game going ( and never looking back).


answered 18 May '11, 14:55

streetsanto's gravatar image


well you seam to be seeking balence in your life! as for being selfish are you or are you not that is the question that you will need to answer! as for changing friend for money it is not really good if those are real friend! real friend are the one that don't care about the amount of money you have! if your new friend care only about money if bad luck happen and you are brooke those new friend will go away and you will need your old friend! so chose your friend wisely! i hope it helped you!


answered 30 May '11, 02:50

white%20tiger's gravatar image

white tiger

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