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This is a question I could only ever write high because sober I never feel this way, and I would be too inhibited to admit that I even smoke. Right now, I feel great. Life feels good, the sunlight outside is actually 'bright', compared to the dull norm. It's like I can actually feel my heart beating (metaphor, explaining a feeling of 'life' or 'energy' or 'drive'). Beyond that I could explain how music sounds better, richer, etc but I'm pretty sure that's just the weed's fault. Anyway, I describe this feeling as "feeling alive". It's feeling like you're a kid again, there's a purpose to things. While all of this is (for me) drug induced, it is a way I did feel many years ago before I ever started smoking. I've wondered if this is just part of aging or becoming an adult, or a feeling I can learn to experience normally without the aid of 'crutches'. Can one feel this way normally without extenuating circumstances?
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I used to smoke regularly and I felt the same sensations you are at the moment. I quit after I started meditating... meditation has made those sensations feel so much more real and as if they are coming from me and not drug induced. I also feel more in control of myself... and actually, I feel like myself. Drugs always made me feel like a different person... and while I saw beauty in things while high, it was just kind of bittersweet in a way. Like "wow! This feels so good... but its not me..." I'm happier now. Drugs could have never given me what I have now. Not that I have anything against them... I guess I just lost interest in them since I've learned to be happy without that kind of dependency. I feel much more alive now than I did using them, and mostly motivated... when I was high, I was completely unmotivated. |
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Watch smoking that stuff, I still remember that old television ad against it. In the ad I believe there was a girl that smoked a marinara cigarette and went crazy! She poured gasoline over her car and lit it on fire while she was actually laughing about it! It said something like "This is what happens to your brain on drugs." |
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Another question that took me quite a lot of (possibly unnecessary) time and effort to gain any ground on. I am going to phrase this question to be a bit more helpful to those who may find it later. Important lesson I've learned is how I frame my very approach to a question has a huge impact on how accurate and 'acceptable' the answer can be to me.