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I lived safe and boring for many years, then suddenly decided I wanted to live and love and create and allow, and that's a good thing. That's progress, I was sure of it... Now, I have been listening to the people who have what I had not, and to be honest, they don't seem to care much for it: Got the house, now I gotta clean it. Got the family, now I gotta feed them. Got the money, doesn't buy love. Got the love, ptttttthhhhht. So what? Over rated. So here I am, I'm finding myself bumping into the people and places I visualized and fantasized about. I'm smiled at, chatted up, given favor, taken out on dates and been treated very nicely. I am not complaining, not saying I don't enjoy it, but I am looking at it all with something of a jaundiced eye. Knowing how so many others feel; that none of it has any real value at all, I'm wondering, is it worth it? I know that when you are in vibrational alignment with your desire, it can seem like no big deal, the experience was more in the process, I get that, and that's cool. I'm just wondering: Now that its here, do I still even want it? And that's fine, too. If I don't want it (him, them), no problem, I'll do what I like, regardless. :) My question comes in that I can't help but notice, this is where I came in! This is exactly how I viewed my desires for years. Questioning whether it is worth the effort. Is this the finish line for all desire? Was it all just to go from point A to B to C, and back to A again? To find that "Vanity, vanity, all is vanity and vexation of spirit." ? If that is so, I'll work with it, I will ask your advice on how to enjoy it anyway. Or have I just got this all wrong, and I'm heading off in the wrong direction? Again, if so, I'll work with it. I really I hope you can see what I'm saying - I really can't tell whether I have gone forward in this, or slipped backward.
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@Grace, watch this video BASHAR EXPLAINS about ECHO before you read further. Pay attention to it from timeline 3:10 to 4:00 min...exactly what's happening to you (and mui:) We have talked about this pendulum syndrome about swinging between positive and negative at this stage so I am just gonna reproduce here what I wrote in comments some other place...
But I know this and you know this:) Yes, the feelings have to be "dealt" with, "coped" with (all wrong words used to make a point)... ...I have tried to ask the same question five different ways here, the answers are not the 'secret we all knew but held back from you' type:) It's still the same but what will be unique to you (and to me and to every individual) is the direction where you are headed as you mention. There is no right or wrong direction! There maybe a 'wrong direction' you may feel you are headed towards but that is upto you to decide. The choices are still yours. Free will! Even the choice to feel miserable about being headed towards what you feel is a wrong direction, is still yours! There's no slipping back (even as I write this, I know I am reaffirming this to myself), you are not going anywhere, you never came from anywhere! You are just re-remembering who you are!! You decided to change the 'COMFORT ZONE' you were in by seeking...whatever. So did I, and maybe that's why we came to this site...if you jump into something there will be some displacement (like in water), some beginners luck:), some good laps in between:), but as they say about writing, everyone knows the beginning and the end, its the middle portion that's a B#$tch...that we all have to stick it out, not give up. Aah, but I know that you know this as well:) If you haven't already, read @Fairy Princess beautiful answer about 'happiness' Ways to Happiness Her story really touched my heart, I didn't feel right to say it over there, but it made me thinking 'What am I complaining about?' More importantly it made me think that I should be grateful always and not in comparison with anybody. I must learn to count my blessings and not dwell on what hasn't come yet (because it will eventually, know that) Take it easy, this should be fun, this is fun, was fun when I started (wasn't it?). We all, at times, get caught up in over-thinking stuff!! Have a laugh (and don't doubt it...lol)... And don't make HIM feel like this:))
@Xoomaville - great point about us all being on our own journey. The Aquarian age is much more about individuals finding their own answers to spiritual problems rather than looking outside themselves. Love the cartoon. Thanks for posting.
(27 Jul '12, 03:43)
Catherine
@Xoomaville you made me cry. Thanks for the compliment. Why didn't you think it appropriate to mention over there?
(27 Jul '12, 09:53)
Fairy Princess
Ok, @Xoomaville, you know me pretty well. I like that. You know where to go to touch exactly what is freaking me out and point out your own previous success over it or that of others, or even just to point out we are in the same place. I know I'm supposed to be strong and rise above everything and be wonderful all of the time but...
(27 Jul '12, 09:54)
Grace
I'm just bloody not, and I will not lie about it. I always appreciate your answers to me, including the one you quoted here, but I was just too upset that night to answer you. Anyway, thank you for touching me once again. That Bashar video is surreal, it is so exactly what is happening to me, and I can now clearly see my path and I can't......
(27 Jul '12, 10:05)
Grace
...thank you enough. I am not supposed to need any help but I do. I think you know that I love you very much, and that if all I ever got from this adventure was your frindship, I would consider myself very fortunate. :) You defenately know how much I love a good laught at 6:00 a.m. with my coffee, and... "...everyone knows the begginning and the end, its the middle portion thats a B#$tch... made me laugh out loud and spray coffee all over the bed....
(27 Jul '12, 10:10)
Grace
You may also know that I almost never mark an answer as The Accepted One. I just don't believe in it. :)
(27 Jul '12, 10:10)
Grace
@Catherine, glad you liked the cartoon. This one is also on my wall, reminds me not to focus on that one stone but to remember many others we are being saved from:)
(27 Jul '12, 10:14)
Xoomaville
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@Fairy Princess, Oh, you should've have smiled instead with pride:) I just felt, if I mentioned it over there, it will dilute your answer. Even though you were responding to my question, your answer is so pure and honest, I didn't want to mess it up by mentioning something about me and making it "me, me, me":)) Anyways, I am not good with paying straight compliments:) but I do it my way:)
(27 Jul '12, 10:20)
Xoomaville
@Grace, You are strong and you know that as well:) But, I know what you mean, just know that we all freak out at times, over one issue or another...its a good thing we are sorta going through this early in our spiritual career (ahem:) please do watch that Bashar vid. I watch it quite often, its one of the 'practical' ones:) You'll be okay Gracie:))
(27 Jul '12, 10:26)
Xoomaville
@Xoomaville It was a happy cry. I was smiling and crying. I am moved that it touched you. :)
(27 Jul '12, 10:39)
Fairy Princess
@Xoomaville, I will. I also want to print that cartoon, I love it! It think I'll do better when I remember not to panic. I don't know where I got the idea that my emotions are emergencies...? :)
(27 Jul '12, 11:10)
Grace
@Xoomaville I too find it difficult to pay compliments. I love to receive them though, so I realize I must give more to get more.
(27 Jul '12, 11:44)
Fairy Princess
I changed my mind.
(24 Aug '12, 16:27)
Grace
@Xoomaville, Love this! Thanks!
(25 Aug '12, 04:56)
figure8shape
@Xoomaville Very good comic strip there! I like it and yes it shows a good lesson too. :-)
(25 Aug '12, 21:44)
Wade Casaldi
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I have asked a similar question a few ` different ways. What I have found is that when we are simply happy, the things we truely desire come to us as if by magic. I only recently learned about the Law of Attraction, so didn't really know what was going on before. When I look back though, when I was at my happy times, when a desire popped into my head, it was filled pretty quickly, not always in ways I expected. I am so glad I finally know what was happening. It is like I have come full circle. I am so excited for remembering that I get to choose happiness and how easily life flowed/s when I was/am happy. I had been trying to teach the concept to my son. The understanding I have gained about the LOA since participating here at IQ has really helped me to better teach my son. He has taken off with it. I rarely get smoked turkey legs, but I did recently. I knocked on my son's door to offer him one. He was playing a video game and his army was eating. He had just decided that a turkey leg would be very nice right now. Instantly I knocked on the door to offer him one. That is how it works. 1
@Fairy Princess - LOL! Thank you for your answer. I went to bed last night all troubled and tied up in knots, and woke up to all these lovely responses, and I can't tell you how much it has helped. I love you all - I will never be able to say thanks enough. Reading your answer, I am thinking, again, that I have to stop panicking. You're right, if I would let things flow, they would flow. I always seem to think I've got to have such an iron grip on everything... That's got to go. :)
(27 Jul '12, 13:16)
Grace
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Grace I am not sure how much you know of esoteric understanding but this photograph fits what you are talking about. Listen to the song Tomorrow Never Knows by the Beatles. "We all play the of existence to the end... Of the beginning..." The teachings tell us that we are trying to find the end but when we find true awakening we have traveled full circle to reach the beginning. Read the book The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho We may feel we are sliding back but we need to know if we are sliding back or perhaps have come full circle. The sure way to tell is if you feel sure of your self or not, in other words does this feel like an awakening to you or a set back? 1
@Wade - great answer. From what I read I think Grace is in a way different place from a few weeks ago even if it doesn't feel quite the way she expected.
(27 Jul '12, 03:39)
Catherine
@Wade,@Catherine, you are right. I have traveled in something of a circle, but not a circle, which reminds me of the upward turning spiral of life - we keep coming up on the same things, but from up a bit higher, so the same but different. I can see that now, thank you. Wade, I loved The Alchemist, I will read it again.
(27 Jul '12, 09:39)
Grace
Whew, @Catherine! This roller coaster is quite a ride! I think I will stick it out, thinking of you and everybody who has either taken this ride with me or watched cheering as my safety belts! To help me remember it will be ok. Thanks, Catherine. I need to remember - Don't panic!
(27 Jul '12, 09:40)
Grace
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They talked about The Alchemist at church on Sunday. They are doing a book study on it. She talked about coming full circle but with more knowledge. I totally feel that way too. It reminds me of a video game. Each level gets more advanced and you use the skills you got from the previous levels.
(27 Jul '12, 09:59)
Fairy Princess
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@Grace-Dear Grace.Your question sounds similar to this one,Stingrays answer is great-http://www.inwardquest.com/questions/5839/is-it-wrong-if-i-dont-feel-anything-about-a-wish-i-really-really-want-to-manifest/5850 :)
Also it might help to re-read this answer of Stingrays to an earlier question of yours as youll be reading it from a different point of You.Im only starting to understand now some of answers to earlier questions I asked :)
@Grace-Here is your earlier question im referring to http://www.inwardquest.com/questions/53140/why-does-giving-in-to-sadness-seem-like-such-a-relief-wont-sadness-lose-me-the-manifestations-im-waiting-for/53164
@Barry Allen, thanks for the edit! :)
@Satori, thank you so much. If we ever need proof we are changing, that will do it, won't it? Some things seem the same, but the answer you linked is for an earlier model Grace, and she could only understand just sooo far.... She's gone now. I've definately changed. :)
@Satori, I don't know if you are aware, but everything you post comes through in this gentle but strong, loving voice that always touches the heart of the matter, and of me. Makes me think of clear, sweet, but unrelentingly streaming water. Always so gentle and true. I never feel I have to brace myself when I see your name addressing me. Even if it's a hard truth, you make my landing on it soft. I love your voice. It's a beautiful gift. Thank you for sharing. :)
@Grace-Wow Grace, thank you so much for the wonderful compliment:). No I was not aware.Im glad I put you at ease.I also feel a lot of warmth and honesty in your writing. While were complimenting each other may I just say your a wonderful asset to IQ.You ask some amazing questions that elicit equally amazing answers that will benefit a lot of people. Thank you for being here Grace:)
@Grace-A song for you Grace, I thought the lyrics might be revelant:) enjoy. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Y0MvOvM7g4&sns=em
Thank you @Satori! Love it! :D
@Grace and @Satori , not sure why I was drawn to this question this morning except now reading of you Grace thanking Satori for the gentle strongness and Satori's reply , I have tears running down my face , tis beautifull to know that there really are such wonderfull caring people and I wanted to let you know the ripple effect reading these words has had ♥♥♥
@Starlight - I'm so glad this made you happy, you are clearly very sensitive. @Satori is indeed a wonderful and caring person, I agree. :) He has helped walk me through many painful and confusing moments, and is very dear to me. Sometimes my heart just sort of explodes all over my keyboard lol, this was one of those times.