Hello everyone. I would like to start by thanking you for taking the time to read this. It contains white aura, a spirit and some more stuff about myself. I hope my experiences will interest you. For me, it will feel good to get off my chest and possibly some responses also. Feel free to ask any questions you want :).

I am a 24 year old Dutch man whom has just finished his studies in Business. When I was 19 I started interesting myself in myself and started reflecting on life pretty much whenever I could. I did some meditating and found that I could travel very deeply. My understanding on life and its energies sky-rocketed and I became insanely happy. My ego was dissolved tremendously for a year or so, I could play around with my mind as if it was a toy, I was sincerely in the 'now' whenever I choose to be, etc. While I was insanely happy, wise and emphatic, I could not talk about my deeper observations as these interpretations on life are not accepted in my society. That wasn't too bad because I was enjoying myself so deeply, but I remember the first book I read on it (the Four Agreements) and the ecstasy I experienced when I realized I was not alone. At that time, I could already feel power coming off of nature (including people). I actually read that book in Madagascar, as I wanted to spend some time away from electricity so I could have the tranquility I was sure I needed at that time. Also, I went specifically there because I wanted to feel the nature there.

What could I see? I do not remember the first exact moment that I first started seeing auras, but I was 19. I could see white energy coming of certain people and certain plants and trees. I spent my time wandering about to figure out what I could see and where it came from. "Why can I see (feel) it on the tree, but do I not feel it coming of this moss?" I could see them for around 1.5 years. I felt it was possible because my ego was lowered and less 'filtering' took part in my brain. I could see them strongly when I shot my body into the 'now' and just started enjoying my senses. People with energy were often similar to myself; they were people who were awake, who could see, feel, touch, people who had connected more with themselves. People with more spiritual power, so to speak. Trees, however, some just felt more powerful than others.

I my room at night I could see these blobs of black/grey floating around in the room. They are about 40cm in diameter and the shapes alter a bit, it sort of reminds me of a white blood cell. I honestly never thought anything of it until I read something about this on IQ. I just thought it was something with my eyes, but when I think back I realize that I haven't seen those as longs as I haven't seen auras.

Then one time I woke up in the middle of the night in Indonesia to find a person shaped energy standing 2 meters away from me. It was black, very black, with no distinguishable limbs but with a head. Sort of reminds me of a taller snow man. No panic or anything, but I did rub out my eyes in disbelief and continued to look at it until I realized ### was going on. After waking up and staring at the things for over 10 seconds I realized the bloody thing was looking at me (it had no eyes but I could feel it, I felt connected to it). That seemed to be its cue to leave, because it started sliding away so I couldn't see it anymore. I followed it outside but it wasn't there anymore. The energy didn't feel like something harmful at all, it just felt curious. I have developed the notion that it seemed surprised that I could see it, though it has been 2 years since then and the mind can play tricks on people.

Anyhows, now I could add the experience of a spirit to my auras. I am sure that many members of IQ realize that people consider you a retard when you tell them this. Telling people you have seen an energy (which they translate to ghost) will have serious consequences in the Dutch society. It is not accepted. You are allowed to host midget orgies, but seeing spirits is too much.

Again, I was still happy, didn't care much.

However, before that event my witnessing of auras was already decreasing, and I think the spirit killed it. While I was very enthusiastic about having seen it, I think my body also started shutting down the possibility to partake in that realm as unconsciously I do not want to see everything that is going on all the time. Happy white energy tree is fine, happy dark spirit lurking over my bed is not.

As you can interpret from my story my ego is again having the best of me. I'm allowing it though, because I need to organize many things in this time of my life and I am waiting for a better opportunity to reconnect. Some years have passed since I could see these things and I am slowly starting to accept the fact that I do not have to be ashamed of this and that I am not alone. I recently told my little brother that I could see auras in the past, which is a pretty big indicator that I'm getting to terms with things. I am starting to get curious again. In the past I never trained to see anything, I just enjoyed what I saw. Now I wonder how far I can go. But also if I will be able to retain my sanity.

I am the only person I know in the flesh (I have been contacted on FB by some people when I made a remark on a website though) who could see energy. I am insanely social and have a tremendous load of great friends who would accept me for who I am, but I still can't bring myself to tell it to them. It is a lonely place. For the past few weeks, I cannot get it out of my mind that this is a skill that I should consider developing. That it would give more meaning to my life. I read on the website here that people see colours in auras and it has got me intrigued. Still, a normal life also attracts me. I am just not sure on what to do. Anyone who has walked to path, please respond. I would love to know how the choices you have made in life affected you. Have you found a way to help people with your abilities?

Again, I will be very happy to answer any questions! I am also very curious if someone had / is having the same experiences as I did.