Like a stock exchange, where the exchange matches buyers with sellers, the universe is a giant exchange where we co-create. People and things find their way to our lives matching our vibrations with theirs.

To answer whether there is a big overall plan or pattern to our collective wishes and whether our higher selves control us in some way, the answer to both is 'yes'. The grand plan of our higher selves is to make us self-aware and then through many trials and errors over many lifetimes, unite us to them. That's where this game ends and the next game (whatever that may be) starts. So yes, our higher selves keep an eye on the proceedings in general, and nudge and guide us as they see fit. These nudges come in the forms of inspiration, pain and circumstances that we think random.

Furthermore, events are in general created around areas that you need to work on, so you can progress. If you are predominantly in a place of negativity, you get negative events in your life, which are simply incentives for you to work on your 'issues'. As you habitually get into a more positive state of mind, such 'tests' and 'lessons' dramatically reduce, as you have fewer 'issues' to resolve.

Don't forget also, that who we are born as, in what circumstances and with what mental and physical capability are also pre-determined by the higher self. In fact you really think about it, how much of these spiritual topics one would "get" is largely determined by where one is in the cycle of reincarnation, and what personality one is born with in this life --- so you could say like Shakespeare that we are just actors in a grand stage.

Side note: I have recently read up a lot about soul ages, and it made a lot of sense to me.

Here is another example of how the whole thing is controlled from a much higher level: Dinosaurs, big reptiles and big predators once ruled the earth. If they were to continue ruling the earth, humans wouldn't have a chance. Humans might have been able to somehow survive in caves as just another species in the periphery, but they most certainly wouldn't be where they are now. So what happens? All the big and 'dangerous' animals suddenly vanish, leaving the field open for man to occupy. Who orchestrated it if not the Source? The dinosaurs most certainly didn't one day call a meeting and say "Brothers and sisters, our time is up, we need to make way for humans, so we need to all die, like right now".

Hope this helps.

Firstly, why is there a need for the Universe to keep everything in "balance"? What does "balance" mean to you? If the Universe is in a constantly expanding and growing state, I do not see why there is a need for it to balance itself.

But let's assume the Universe is able to balance itself perfectly - in your question, you only mentioned "our" desires, the things we want, etc.. which refers to us humans. But the Universe is much more bigger than just us humans! The plants around us, the fish in the ocean, the animals in the zoo, even the annoying cockroach in your house - do they not have their own desires too? What we humans desire sometimes may not come in another human form, but from a lot of ways.

A good example would be our emotions. Some of us desire the emotions of love, confidence, powerfulness, etc.. in the past we might think that we need certain events to generate these emotions in us, hence we desired these events. But when you learn more about reality creation, you realize that these emotions can be generated out of pure nothingness - where is the balance coming from in this place ?

a circle or sphere designed
from mind infinite of scope
in play of opposites
ethereal and material

The restaurant staff thing reminded me of something that has stayed with me, from the Pleiadians via Marciniak, extract from Bringers of the Dawn, which I think is relevant here.

"When you go to a restaurant and order something you want, the chef prepares it and the waiters bring it to you. You order it; however, you don't make it. Somehow the cooks or the spiritual energy make it, you select it to be put before you. It will not be put before you unless you go into the restaurant and order it in the first place. So you are responsible for it and you pay for it.

Life is the same way, life is like a restaurant. Learn how to order what you want from life like you do in a restaurant and trust that, because you ordered it, it will be put before you. When you go into a restaurant, you don't worry over every item and wonder whether or not you deserve to have it. Well sometimes you do. Sometimes you say. "Well, I don't deserve to have that. It costs $15 dollars. I can only have something that costs $7 or less."

The way you act in restaurants is a wonderful indication of the way you act in life. It is an incredible teaching to understand. When you go into a restaurant, do simply order and say, "This is what I want" and trust that it is going to come to you, or do you worry that they are going to screw it up? As soon as the order is in, do you follow the waiter into the kitchen and say, "Oh, they probably won't have the right lettuce. They probably won't sauté those onions just so, and they won't have the kind of mushrooms I want." No. You trust it will be presented to you exactly the way you want it and you let it go. When it is presented to you, you say, "Thank you." If it is not quite right, you ask for what is needed and then you proceed.

Look at the divine nonchalance you have when you order things in a restaurant. That is how you order up life. Get clear on what you want, order it and be done with it. Don't keep calling up Spirit to see if they got the order or give advice on how to fill it. You ordered it. Trust that it will come."

the answer is yes if you open a restaurant some people are interested in cooking some people want to eat good food at reasonable price with a good service. would it be reasonable to open a restaurant where there is all ready one or more? or should you open it where there is none and a need for one?

as for things out of balance: in this world there is often things in division things out of balance look at people that seek power, wage war, create weapon of mass destruction, accumulate wealth in extreme making other people poor or sick, for there own desire.

would you not say that this scale is out of balance?

what about a boss that seek power, money. and that do not pay is employee what he own them, is there imbalance?

from bible.

Shall we give, or shall we not give? But he, knowing their hypocrisy, said to them, Why tempt you me? bring me a penny, that I may see it.

And they brought it. And he said to them, Whose is this image and superscription? And they said to him, Caesar's.

Give back to Caesar what is Caesar's and to God what is God's

also from the Gospel of Thomas.

They showed Jesus a gold coin and said to him, "Caesar's agents are exacting taxes from us." He said to them, "Give unto Caesar the things that are Caesar's, give unto god the things that are god's, and give unto me that which is mine.

Let there be light, be the light that you can be, experience and enjoy.