I wish you all the power in the stars for your recovery, Jaianniah.

I would recommend to find some kind of body position that is tolerable enough to be able to visualize, and then perform as many blessings of strong things and beings that you can. Bulls, ocean windmills, beams in skyscrapers, the carbon fiber in ultralight bicycle frames, concrete frames, the silk in spiderwebs, the stone in obelisks, dinosaurs, huge ships, the space shuttle hull, elephant bones, teeth, coral shells, lobster pliers, ant legs, steel-reinforced concrete walls, the Eiffel tower, gorillas, the willpower of children, women who lifted cars to free a trapped child, bodybuilders, female bodybuilders, amazons, Diana the God, Wonder Woman, Hillary Clinton, cliffs, islands, or the earth itself.

Further, I recommend resistance training- I am quite serious, lift weights. In your current condition this will most likely mean finding some kind of movement that is actually, barely tolerable- and if it's just a few millimeters, or just some body parts, and no weight as of yet. Great care needs to be taken to find the movement that is tolerable, where the pain that it does cause is not the kind that makes things worse, but the kind that may signal a potential for change, and make you just a tiny little bit stronger. However, this will signal to your body that you wish to live, and grow, and that strength is important to you. You may actually be capable of performing a bench press, lying down, and perhaps some other exercises- perhaps a leg press- unloaded at first. This is mostly about its suggestive nature, like a physical prayer.

In order to show your subconscious mind some examples of unexpected strength, below are some women who are much older than you- admittedly also healthier, but I'm not sure where the 92 year old started out- who are strong.

Finally, use Bashar's method to clear negative beliefs. When you feel your physical pain, don't differentiate between that pain and emotional pain- emotional pain is just physical pain that is happening through muscle tension. It's all pain. So feel that pain, breath deeply and slowly, and occasionally ask yourself: What would I have to believe to feel this? When something comes up, that's it- the belief is gone. Negative beliefs don't survive well in the open.

It may also help you to know that in medical terms, your cell directly respond to your thoughts. So if the bones in your back are no longer being properly maintained by your cells, that is a response to some kind of energy emanating from you saying that your it makes sense to no longer properly maintain your backbone. It is not an inherent thing, it is a response to your energy.

So bless every little improvement that your new sustained energy focus may bring you. If you can move a millimeter more, and the pain feels a iota less severe, focus on that improvement and say to yourself: Hello, improvement! Be blessed! Congratultions! Keep going, and things will be much better. Then challenge yourself to a slightly more extended movement, slightly more difficult movement, that is also wisely chosen so it will challenge but not hurt you. Before you know it, you will need to buy a book on barbell training.

This woman started lifting at 92, and no longer needs to use her walker.

Here is a picture of an 82 year old woman who has been at it for a while.