AVBhat

Difficult one to answer this is. In my culture and country arranged marriages are rare.

You will no doubt be under the sort of pressure to marry that a middle class Englishman would know very little about.

However..you did ask so here goes.

I would do what you believe will give YOU the most happiness. Furthermore i would continue that method/criteria of deciding things into your old age.On every subject.

I would ignore any religion/dogma/tradition or convention.

Ultimately there all flawed and mostly man made.

The power is in yourself because Source dwells there. Source wants your joy, You want your joy. Get joy....and do and think whatever you have to to get it.

Graham

I do feel for you AVBhat. But none of us can tell you what is best for you, and I agree with Wandering Dude that you do know deep down what is right (it seems quite obvious from here although I appreciate I won't know the whole story).

I wish you all the best for making the best choice for you; just follow your heart and forget the 'shoulds'. All I know is that whenever I follow the shoulds and ignore my heart I regret it. Easy to say and not so easy to do I know.

Sounds like you've come to a fork in the road and you've got to choose a direction. One direction isn't better than the other but they'll both take you to different destinations.

I think you've got to ask yourself what destination you want. Imagine two scenarios a few years down the line - which will yield the most meaning in your life? We all purport to look for success and happiness in life when what we're really looking for is meaning.

As the others pointed out, I think you already know which route will hold the most meaning for you, but only you can make that decision. Don't ever compromise your true desires - you can still have a job and marriage. Maybe both aren't supposed to happen at the same time - take the route you know you're supposed to take now and I have a funny feeling that the other will follow in time - I have the distinct impression you're not over the hill yet.

I maybe wrong but if you are questiong the marriage then I think you already know that it may not be for you. I was in a similar situation five years ago although not as heavy. I chose what I thought was love and I have to say although it wasnt one of my finer choices(putting it mildly!) I certainly would not be the person I am now without choosing the wrong choice! What im trying to say is that if you put it out there, the universe (I believe) will most definately lead on the right path eventually. But for your immediate future, listen to your own questions, how would you answer if it was someone else asking? If your looking in from the outside, what would be your first instinctive answer to the person asking? I wish you all the luck!!! xxx

you make your choice and i do not see why it could not be for you to have both choice at the same time who say you can't do both? is someone trying to imposse some choice on you and for what reason? are those reason valid? and once you make the choice can you be sure you will not regret it what ever the outcome knowing that you took the best choice you could have made?

i think you are more interested in the job than marriage. you dont believe in arranged marriage!. take the job and the marriage will follow you. but have faith! Best of Luck.