First, you have to catch your self-talk or become aware of your self-talk. Second, if you hear yourself say something like "I don't like chocolate" or "I hate it when people argue with me." You then ask your self "What do I like?" you say "I like Vanilla" or "I like hazelnut." or "What do I want?" you say "I want peace and understanding in my conversations" or "I like it when there's agreement"

For awhile, I had to constantly repeat to myself "What do I want?" or "What would make me happy?" I repeated these like a mantra, but you have to answer yourself. When you answer yourself make sure your not saying to yourself what you don't like or don't want. Immediately, find the opposite and say what you do want or do like.

If you know what you don't want, you can restate it into what you do want. for example " I hate down" you say "I like up". or "don't like cold" you say "I like hot" or "I hope I don't get into that situation again" you say "I hope I get into a this situation next time."

You are probably in the habit of thinking that something will happen to "suck you right back into it". You may have to change your actions, too, of course, if something you are physically doing is bringing the situation back over and over. You can also create an affirmation to counter the habitually negative thought. Don't resist your thoughts on this subject, but rather replace them with the positive words and feeling that you prefer. It can be tedious, but it is worth it. In time your new thoughts will be the habit and the old will fall away.

I have decided that I am very good at quiting things I don't want in my life,and that works for me.