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Stingray talks about why some people don't have success with manifesting techniques. The first and second main reasons he says are

  1. Getting stuck in mind
  2. Lack of emotional sensitivity

I agree that you have to master those points first to be able to feel better. Therefore I want to share a method which I find highly valuable to help with those points. It also uncovers deep hidden limiting beliefs at lightning speed if you master the technique with a little bit of practice.

It is called the "Eugene Gendlin's Focusing". So here it is.

1- Clearing space

The first step is called clearing space. What I like you to do is just be silent and take a moment just to relax. Inside you I would like you to pay attention inwardly in the middle of your body, perhaps in your stomach or your chest. Now see what comes there when you ask

"How is my life going? What is the main thing for me right now?"

Sense within your body. Let the answer come slowly as a sense in your body. When some concern comes, don't go inside it. Stand back and say "Yes, that's there. That's one thing. I can feel that, yes. That's there alright." And let there be a little space between you and that.

And then ask what else you feel. If it weren't for that, would you be all ok? Wait again and sense. There are usually 3 or 4 things.

2- Getting a "Felt Sense"

The second step is called "Getting a Felt Sense". From among what came select one personal problem to focus on. And then just choose it, don't go inside it! Stand back from it a little! Of course there are many parts to that one thing you are thinking about. Too many parts to think each one alone. But you can feel all these things together.

Pay attention in that place where you usually feel things! And in there you can get a sense of what all of the one problem feels like. Let yourself feel the unclear sense of all of that!

3- Getting a handle

The third step is called "getting a handle". You need to ask yourself

"What is the quality of this unclear Felt Sense?"

Let a word or a phrase or an image come up from the Felt Sense itself. It might be a quality word, a body quality like "thight", "sticky", "scary", "stuck", "heavy", "jumpy". Or it might be a phrase or an image.

Stay with the quality of that Felt Sense till something fits it just right.

4- Resonating

In the fourth step of focusing you move back and forth between the Felt Sense and the word phrase or image. We call it resonating. You go back and forth between the Felt Sense and that word or image and you check how they resonate with each other.

You see if there is a little bodily signal that lets you know it fits. And to do that you have to get the Felt Sense back again as well as the word or phrase. Let the Felt Sense change if it wants to. And let the word change until it feels just right capturing the quality of the Felt Sense.

5- Asking

The fifth step is called "asking". Now ask

"What is it about this whole problem that makes this quality, this Felt Sense?"

which you have just named or pictured. Make sure that the quality is sensed again freshly, vividly - not just remembered from before! When it's here again tap it, touch it, be with it, ask it "what makes the whole problem so ...?" whatever it is, whatever you called it.

Or ask "What is in this sense?". If you get a quick answer without a physical shift, a little physical signal that the Felt Sense is different, just let that kind of answer go by. Bring your attention back to your body and freshly find the Felt Sense again. And then ask it again.

Be with the Felt Sense until something comes along with the shift, with a bodily change. It might be very slight but a distinct bodily change that lets you know, that answer, or opening, or step really makes a difference to your body. A kind of answer that has some give or release or easing in the body that goes with it.

6- Receiving

The sixth and final step is called "receiving". Whatever comes with that little bit of physical shift, receive that in a friendly way, whatever it is. Stay with it a little while, even if it's only a very slight release. Whatever comes is only one little step.

There will be many others. And what it says now will change many times. You will continue after a little while but stay there for a few moments and sense again what actuaally came.

asked 05 Dec '12, 01:42

releaser99's gravatar image


edited 31 May '13, 07:41

@releaser99 - I like this, thank you. I have some questions, if you would perhaps expand on this a little?

I noticed that each of the things (feelings) I could identify in that first step inhibited my breathing quite a bit. I was sort of tripped up by this and wasn't sure how to proceed from there. Would you say I should just try to breathe around that feeling? ....

(31 May '13, 00:20) Grace

..... My automatic response was to sort of wriggle away from it, lol which defeats the purpose, I know. Taking the deep, cleansing breath I craved seemed to dissipate the whole feeling, which felt good but also defeated the purpose. :)

I was able to identfy it in the third step as "jagged" and "rough", like a piece of driftwood, but I think my confusion about my breath prevented me from hearing an answer in the fifth step. Any advice?

(31 May '13, 00:21) Grace

@Grace "Would you say I should just try to breathe around that feeling?" Do whatever makes you more comfortable and try to stay with that feeling. If breathing in deeply gives you relief - do it! Step 5 is for feeling relief anyway. So the "answer" in Step 5 is a shift in feeling which feels like deep relief. For me the purpose of this whole exercise is to learn to listen to negative feelings, to stay with them despite their demanding nature. Because usually we look away and suppress deep

(31 May '13, 07:59) releaser99

seated emotions. So we lose our connection to our feelings. But if you practice going into these feelings and staying with them you learn two things. 1. They can do no harm to you, they can't kill you, though it feels like that sometimes :). But it's all illusion. You are always in total control. 2. By staying with and observing negative emotions as a neutral observer your negative feelings lose power and they dissipate (as you already experienced:).

(31 May '13, 07:59) releaser99

I use the Focusing Method in my daily routine. However I changed my approach a little bit. After Step 3 I switch to Faster EFT. Because... it makes it faster :). So I don't wait till Step 5 to feel relief. I just tap the Felt Sense away. In your case I would say "jagged and rough, like a piece of driftwood" at each tapping point and tap it away :). But I think it can still be valuable to go through all steps when you feel you need to train your emotional guidance a little bit more.

(31 May '13, 08:04) releaser99

Having all that said there is a subtle but important point. "seemed to dissipate the whole feeling" I would say that if the dissipation feels like relief (like when doing Focus Blocks), you are on the right track. If the dissipation feels like you suppress the feeling or shove it away, the exercise could be less beneficial.

(31 May '13, 08:11) releaser99

@releaser99 - Excellent, thank you. I think I am just not aware of how aware I have become lol! I like the feeling of being a dispassionate, therefore powerful observer, which this practice really highlights. Once I am in that place, I can do what I like with a feeling, and as you say, its all an illusion. None of my boogeymen can stand the light of day. :) It feels like this does me good, thank you.

(31 May '13, 08:42) Grace

@releaser99- Great post. I'm going to use this in the future, it resonates with me. Its just dawned on me that bashars belief question of "what do i have to believe it true about myself in order to..." has the subtle quality of detachment from the problem. It's sort of like giving yourself the chance to either keep on believing it or believe in something else. Nice.

(31 May '13, 08:57) Nikulas
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