Don't try to avoid them and try to examine them! ALLOW All that is happening to BE happening the way it is, no matter if it's just 'in your head' or in physical reality around you.

The fact is that most people don't want to see the not-so-light part of life. They think if they don't see it it will go away.

I like a story about a monk who used to meditate for 20 years in solitude in a cave. After 20 years of meditation and achievieng what he thought 'enlightenment', he decided to go out in the 'real world'. So he went to the nearest town and upon first woman he saw he instantly had an erection.

The monk felt ashamed and disgusted with himself, feeling he had vasted all this time and returned to the cave, where he was all alone.

The thing is that when you are on a consciously choosen spiritual path you will not leave ANY stone unturned eventually, because the more 'shit' you consciously bring into your life, the more in-singhts you can have into those experiences and to finally know that it is all you and it has been you all along. At least that's how it is for me.

Right now I can't remember when I got really angry with someone. I mean, the feeling shows up from time to time but I really don't priject it anymore on the people who are the igniters of those feelings. I know that the way I feel is my responsibility and it is caused by a corrupt belief system - a belief system not alligned with my true, natural self.

And on the other hand that understanding makes me feel understanding and love for myself. I know that if it is their it was my choice to experience it in my life and now it's my choice if I finally want to let go of it, simply because it doesn't serve me anymore.

And the more I do it that way the easier it is to transmute those challenges into insights until a time I believe will come one day, when it will be so easy that I will just laugh exactly at the time the negative feeling or thought will come up, and change it instantly, inside my head. That will begin a new chapter in my life, but until that day comes I'm having all the time I can with the feelings of - sadness, anger, envy, unworthiness, lack of trust, being a victim, poverty issues and so on.

In fact I really, just like you, invite them into my life and I do it because the faster I do it the faster I will get over it and start playing the game with new skills and experiences. Also I believe that there is no escaping that and the more you try to supress this side of your nature the more it will haunt you and become a burden.

So, practically, what do I do when it happens? I try to stay centered and breathe, breathe, breathe.. I examine myself and say that it's ok and that I will never let myself hurt me, because I believe that no other being can hurt me but myself. And that helped me get through some really scary shit -- once I even was afraif to go asleep for I felt I would not wake up in this dimension.

But most of the time those are confrontations in my normal life with my family members and friends. I can see most of them changing and they sometimes need someone who have been where they are now, who have had let go old beliefs that they are still clinging on too and they want my help.

So I make myself available for them by being centered and understanding of what they are going through and that in my opinion is enough. They will change anyway but that is in my opinion the fastest and easiest way for all.

You used a key word yourself, and that is witness. Witness this shadow side but don't buy into it, by either analyzing it or trying to avoid it - it really only holds power if you give it. By merely watching it and feeling it without feeding it with thoughts or action, it will soon give up and retreat until eventually it will cease to come calling.

And know that, if it helps, it's okay to express it in a healthy manner through art, writing etc.