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I hate writing questions from first person but this one I can't really think of another way to phrase it. I am very strongly indifferent towards all aspects of life, too much so in certain categories. I can positively explain this as "I can survive comfortably with very little in spite of life's road being a bit 'bumpy' at times." However often it translates much more blandly into a very broad apathy that encompasses anything and anyone if I don't 'force myself' to care. I don't always feel this way, sometimes I'll get surges of "interest" [for lack of a better word] that will drive me towards a goal for awhile or perhaps just make me more driven in all categories for a period, but generally either of these will fade in a short time frame.
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Well Snow , guess what ? I feel completely the same way as you, and I believe many other people feel the same way as you too on this site and even around you. Many people often follow a daily routine till they grow old and eventually pass away ... i.e. waking up early in the morning and going to work, coming home at night and spending time with their family and then maybe take a trip or vacation every year or so. You could also say that these people are pretty apathetic when it comes to their lives because it seems so mundane and boring to someone else. But when you further think about it, the reason why this is the case most of the time is because a lot of people have actually given up on their dreams. If you would think back about your time in pre-school or your earliest days in school, you would probably remember that your teachers probably asked you about your ambitions or to write about your ambitions in the future. Then think about the great and fantastic answers your friends or classmates gave... and then remember them being shut down by society and given up on as you grow older. So... are you really just being apathetic towards life or have you given up on most of your desires or dreams ? If you think that you are just being apathetic towards life, then you might want to ask yourself Why does it really matter to you that you are apathetic towards life ? These are questions which I also ask myself.. Not that I've given up on my dreams, but my dreams have always been outside of the current reality of the planet. They were never something to really 'believe in', because they're all of a Peter Pan-esque nature. [Can we avoid use of my first name por favor? I leave it there in case anyone wants to look and know for themselves, but I'd rather it not be 'that' public. ^_^] Now that I think about it more.. Yea I suppose you were a bit more on the head with this one than I was willing to admit.
(24 Feb '12, 16:49)
Snow
After writing my above comment I stopped and thought about it for a moment and realized I was purposely overlooking certain thoughts / memories to make my opinion valid. "Never theorize before you have data. Invariably, you end up twisting facts to suit theories, instead of theories to suit facts." All of the answers here definitely gave me a lot to think about. Thanks for sharing. =)
(24 Feb '12, 17:07)
Snow
@Snow - I have removed your first name, but I think you already have the power to edit other people's answers with over 1000 karma, I am sure people won't mind you doing that if it's personal
(24 Feb '12, 20:30)
kakaboo
and , maybe it's not giving up on your past dreams, but maybe you don't dare to dream or have great desires anymore, because it just seems so impossible and far to you at the moment..
(24 Feb '12, 20:45)
kakaboo
@kakaboo: You may have been right about giving up on past dreams too. Just sometimes it is hard to distinguish what was actually a genuine dream and what was a childhood fantasy. Like I said, your answer gave me a lot to think about. And I actually don't have the ability to edit other people's posts or anything like that. Retagging is the extent of my options. There's a decent chance that it is just me though. :)
(24 Feb '12, 20:54)
Snow
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Hello Snow, it seems to me that the phrase in your question "sometimes i'll get surges of interest ... that will drive me forward" is important. As Stingray so wisely points out in reply to the question "how do you rekindle your passion?" ... there is a quote from The Master Key System, part 18 " the incentive of attention is interest, the greater the interest, the greater the attention, the greater the attention the greater the interest, action and reaction; begin by paying attention; before long you will have aroused interest; this interest will attract more attention, and this attention will produce more interest, and so on. This practice will enable you to cultivate the power of attention" Next time you have a surge of interest, try using this method, i feel sure it will bring positive results. Hmm. A good answer. And I do put my attention on things that interest me, often an extremely large amount. Then randomly I will run into a breaking point of one variety or another, and all of my interest [and consequently attention] will be lost. Perhaps I'm too critical of things and that's what causes me to lose interest so easily. Hmm.
(24 Feb '12, 17:06)
Snow
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I don't think you need to fix anything because you are not broken. You are who you are at this very moment, and accepting who you are right now no matter what, is the key to the change that you desire. It may be that for some reason deep within, you are not truly accepting or loving of yourself. Whenever we resist ourselves on the inside, we usually reflect that back into the world around us. A good test to find out what you truly think of yourself is to look into a mirror, look into your own eyes, and say, "I love you" a handful of times. Usually on the first try you will found out how you feel about yourself. If there is any type of resistance like feeling stupid for doing it or embarrassment, then you may have just found out that there is resistance to loving yourself. When you can't stare into a mirror and love yourself for even a short period of time, you will probably have the same feeling and emotions of caring about other things for a long period of time in the outer world. I had a very hard time doing this mirror exercise when I first tried it. When you say that you hate yourself for years and years, the inner self has a hard time looking you back in the face and believing anything you have to say that is positive. Once you do this for a while though, and you really start to mean it, it becomes very easy and actually enjoyable, for me at least it has. I've also started to notice that once you begin to care more and more about yourself, you start to find new things to care about in the outer world. When you realize you are just perfect the way you are, and you don't need to be fixed, or there isn't something wrong with you, a lot of things seem to fall into place. Apathy is just resistance that your ego doesn't feel good releasing. It is comforting and safe to your physical construct but not to the real you on the inside. Even if you think you love yourself now, love yourself and appreciate yourself even more and things could turn around in a blink of an eye. Continue to follow your excitement. Once something of interest has faded, find something that interests you again, no matter how small it may be. Continue to keep that train of good positive energy flowing just like an eternal fuel line. The exciting and interesting things you do, large or small, the more positive energy continues to flow through you. Great answer @Cory, I'm definitely going to try the mirror exercise. I could sense just by reading it that it's going to reveal a lot, either good or bad, in either case it's a good thing to discover more things about our own self. Thanks for sharing.
(24 Feb '12, 15:21)
Kriegerd
Hmm. Well, not to sound like a narcissist (I believe we are all a bit narcissistic on the inside) but I like looking at myself in the mirror. Lol. Either way, a lot of things you said resonated in me. Thanks for sharing. =)
(24 Feb '12, 16:34)
Snow
Eh. Early childhood. Guess about 3rd grade. Got progressively worse. Grades dropped as I got older, I stopped doing homework cuz I believed it to be a waste of time since I always was in the top few test scorers. The only reason I graduated high school is because a few of my teachers decided to pass me despite me failing their classes; and a combined team of my teachers, the attendance staff, and the administration decided to overlook my absences being well beyond the mandatory fail limit.
(25 Feb '12, 04:35)
Snow
@Snow I intended to post responses to your other 2 questions, as well as to this one; but I'm beginning to wonder if all these questions are only the product of a bored mind; a game to you. I'm not sure if you really want answers. But - If you're serious about unlocking childhood memories & apathy; I would start with 3rd grade. I don't think apathy develops due to a bored mind. continued
(26 Feb '12, 04:28)
ele
@Snow --- continued ---
(26 Feb '12, 04:30)
ele
@ele: Well, I don't know if my response to that is going to make you feel better or worse. Yes, I'm looking for answers. I'm reminded of Obama jokingly saying "Yes I inhaled. That was the point." I was going to explain how I'm always thinking about numerous things at the same time, and it is something I enjoy along with meditating and yoga and just relaxing in nature, basically like a hobby. But a simpler way to respond would be this: You hit a point on the nose regarding my school. [cont]
(26 Feb '12, 04:47)
Snow
Yes, religious schools till 8th grade. Transition to public schools was pretty interesting coming from a family where saying the word 'butt' was a curse word. But the point here is that these questions have actually been in my head since I guess about when I was 13. I always asked lots of questions, they always didn't like that. Because of the circles I was required to associate with I was very culturally and spiritually sheltered. So finally having an environment where I can talk freely [c]
(26 Feb '12, 04:50)
Snow
is a bit overwhelming. That's why I mentioned before I am 'taking it slow', very slow in fact. ^_^ But anyway, I would describe my mind as 'overproductive' rather than 'bored', because I keep it active just as much as normal people do, in fact far moreso than the norm in my area. Either way, my questions are what they are. Nothing more, nothing less.;) [oh, and I had severe carbon monoxide poisoning and went to ICU for half a week cuz they said I was dying and didn't know why. relevant maybe?]
(26 Feb '12, 04:52)
Snow
~in the third grade, that is. [If that last part didn't quite make sense.] I've always wondered if there could be some connection to long term extreme carbon monoxide exposure (months). But since I don't have the ability to test that myself I don't bother contemplating on it and instead try to work on things that I can address myself. =)
(26 Feb '12, 04:56)
Snow
@ele: Maybe I have the wrong definition of that word.. I thought that meant "religious schooL", not inherently catholic. It was a private christian school. And the insane rules were from my mother more than anything else, though the schools still didn't allow cursing [just not that severe].
(26 Feb '12, 04:58)
Snow
@ele: No.. lol. Not in the context you're saying. I've talked about post-catholocism as a group of religions, and I do that frequently. I do a lot of grouping of similar religions depending on the scope or the context of the conversation. =) As for school, I went to two Christian schools in my youth. Both Christian, not Catholic. My father went to an all boys catholic school, but I fortunately avoided that fate. You're welcome to check my answers or anything..
(26 Feb '12, 05:12)
Snow
@ele: And I'm a bit sad that you're challenging my 'realness' when I've offered to share my identity with you, and you refused. ;) It's very easy to validate any of the information I claim about myself, and the offer to do so is [and will continue to remain] on the table. And yes, that is the definition of Parochial I was using. 'Narrow minded' being one of the operative points. We renamed Martin Luther King Jr's birthday to another name. Famous Presidents Day or something like that. =P
(26 Feb '12, 05:15)
Snow
@ele: Well.. alrighty then. [I'm very confused, again.] For reference, I don't mind sharing my personal information with anyone who is interested enough to ask for it. I already have with a few people here. I just don't want it publicly accessible without someone asking / to anons. Anyway, it is late. Been up too long as it is. Trying to fix my sleep schedule. ^_^ Good night.. Hope you feel better.
(26 Feb '12, 05:23)
Snow
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How do the words "fix my apathy" make you feel? Could it be, perhapse, that the need to "fix" the apathy, is the very thing that's maintaining it? Generally I would do like you do, and look for deeper meanings in the way people phrase things. In this particular case I personally think you're reading into the wrong words. ^_^ Being apathetic, I don't actually feel a need to address the issue, I could take it or leave it. <-- See the problem with that last part? =P I really don't feel a 'need' to fix it, but if I were to "step back" from myself and analyze my situation trying to avoid subjectivity, I'd say it is something I should address.
(24 Feb '12, 16:31)
Snow
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There is a reason why we say some things, and also it seems you are very uncomfortable with the whole isse (resistance). Of course, I could be wrong, but I suggest you consider what I said.
(25 Feb '12, 02:35)
Benjamin
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@Snow - I really think of this as a spiritual issue. I remember apathy; for me, it felt like dead woman walking & the light went out of my eyes.. since you are trying to unlock hidden memories as well as "fix" apathy - may I suggest a soul retrieval? If you see the right Shaman; it can & will bring your 'spirit' back. |
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I have had cases of extreme boredom/apathy in the past, even to the point of being bored of cooking something to eat so I ended up not eating from time to time. Are you familiar with the Abraham-Hicks teachings? There are several processes for that particular state. Also the Sedona Method has a lot of great material. My general advice would be to milk every possible situation where you have interest. Try to look at those things and really focus on them, appreciate them, trying to just get used to that vibration. Also, I think that any kind of meditation would be helpful. It has helped me a lot in any case. Hope it helps, Cheers. 2
Yes Kriegerd and Snow... Boredom is the KEY element that says: "I need more intellectual challenge in my life"... And that challenge is met when you decide to: "Get off the treadmill and live your own life, for your own reasons, in your own right."
(24 Feb '12, 13:08)
The Prophet
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There is a WAY... The problem is, you want to do it YOUR way... Your way won't work. If you were a little less cynical, and a little more specific, I have no doubt that there are many people who would be happy to lend you a hand... I have a complete program that works wonderfully well for most people... But I doubt that my program will do or be what you want... What you want is your way... or nothing. @The Prophet, I notice you are still posting your self-promotion messages. I am now suspending your account for continued violation of Inward Quest policies.
(25 Feb '12, 09:47)
Barry Allen ♦♦
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Yes Kriegerd and Snow... Boredom is the KEY element that says: "I need more intellectual challenge in my life"... And that challenge is met when you decide to: "Get off the treadmill and live your own life, for your own reasons, in your own right."
Count me out Snow... I don't think you're seriously interested.
@The Prophet: Hmm. An interesting judgement for you to make without even attempting to contact me or even speak to me directly.. But if that's the way you feel then c'est la vie. ;)
Just gunna put this here, in case you are interested in the truth:
I'm very open to everything, and genuinely was interested in anything you had to say or share with me. This sentiment does not mean I will necessarily end up following the things I learn from people, but it does mean I will approach -
Anyway: I could be barking up the wrong tree, but it seems you're a bit troubled right now. My email is in my account info. If you decide that you need assistance, or just someone to talk to, you know how to reach me.
snow, be careful of selfpity it drains energy and distracts from other actions, or review if what you see life to be is